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Saturday, December 26, 2009

Baby, Baby, Baby


When you first met her it was “Hey, BABY! "



When you got with her, it was, "Oh, BABY!”




And now you are saying, “We are having a BABY?"


You had no problem saying give it to me baby
but now that I say that we are having a baby
baby, Baby, BABY
your tongue has gone lazy
eight weeks have gone by and all I have heard you do is rant and rave
as if I seduced you and you were a perfect gentleman well behaved
you wanted it just like I did
when I asked what did you want, you declared, "You," and claimed me as your bid

driving for hours back and forth to see each other at night
on the way home trying to stay awake because eye lids were closing tight
your walls show the scars and your headboard is my witness
it was all about survival of the fittest
because you were my weakness
and I was your sweetness
we undressed
our minds linked and our bodies meshed
and we survived
with our busy schedules burning at both ends managing to keep the flame not just lit, but alive
burning like a robust sweet smelling fire
my head telling me I should slow down, but my heart replied, “Don’t listen to your head girl, she’s a liar”
you facilitated boosting my self esteem
vividly illustrated to me what passion really means
as your stroke hit it right on the green
and when the ball made it in the tiny cup, I literally screamed
but now I am screaming at you day and night
you are edging me on, irate and you actually love the fight
you are playing the victim
and treating the woman that you once caressed at night, like scum
thought it was safe to not use condoms; tubes should have been tied
your sperm found my egg and when they connected they shouted, “Let's keep hope alive!”
and now that hole in one that you loved so well
is now the gateway of life, our baby’s birth canal
now you feel bitter

your feelings for me have shriveled and withered

now instead of holding me at night
you murmur about how I am ruining your life
Daddy-to-Be
you are experiencing it mentally
while I deal with the mental anguish and I also experience it physically
but I will not let this bad choice gnaw at my core
what we had is jammed, nailed shut, water tight, closed door
I will also shut the door on my resentment
I want our child to feel loved and not sense our selfish childish contentment


Parents, you can’t disguise or harbor bad feelings towards each other from your child
because the child is you,
both of you
both seeds infused together creating one new unique individual with its own personality
and somewhere along there lies some of the mother and some of the father
are you only going to love the part of the child that is you?
impossible
you did not create that child alone
you created that child with someone
it was a partnership when you made love
and now it is a partnership that you have to endure since you created love
the love for your child should be the foundation

and not what the other parent did or did not do
you have to learn how to get along
both parents
even if you are no longer together
you have to stop acting like you are an infant
and start working together to care for your infant




Copyright 2009 by Veniece Wesson. All rights reserved.